can be fun, but some pagans unfortunately go through a period of
religious fanaticism. And fanaticism often limits an important
part of your spirit: your sense of humor. It takes time to
recover from fanaticism. Now there is a Tarot deck for recovering
pagan religious fanatics.
A priest and
priestess stand facing one another, performing the Great Rite symbolically
by plunging a dagger into a chalice. In the circle surrounding
them, a neophyte covers her smiling mouth, trying to suppress a giggle.
Meaning: Innocence. A new beginning.
There was a time when all of this was good natured fun and not
something you took so seriously.
Difficulty in expressing honest laughter. You're taking this all
too seriously. Get a life.
stands outside his double-parked car in a jammed parking lot. He
wears full ceremonial regalia and has an altar setup, In his
hand is an open book entitled, "Incantations to Asphaltia to find
Meaning: You need to understand your own resources better. Don't use
a sledgehammer to knock on a door.
You have lost sight that the map is not the territory.
A Wiccan priestess
stands, arms outstretched, wearing several pounds worth of pentacles, Celtic
jewelry, astrological bracelets, and medallions. She looks ready
to tip over.
Meaning: You may find yourself with sudden yearnings to
join a Roman Catholic convert or seminary. Even if you're most definitely
not Catholic. Don't scoff. Stranger things have happened
You are ready to liberate yourself from the shackles of your old way of
life and to put on the shackles of a new way of life.
In the middle
of the woods stands a pagan with her face caked in rouge and eye shadow
and lipstick. She holds up a symbol of nature - a miniature plastic
Meaning: Examine that what you claim is your passion, is something
that you're really passionate about.
You are secretly a technocrat.
A pagan bookstore
owner stands behind a counter in a bookstore jam-packed with books, pentacles,
candles, Celtic jewelry, Tarot decks, etc. Behind him a sign reads, "Pagan
Emporium Bookstore: Offering Ancient Wisdom Since 1995."
Meaning: Don't just settle for "Question authority." Question
those who claim to be authority.
Question those authors who tell you to question authority, but then still
want you to buy their books and follow their advice verbatim.
A solemn Wiccan
priest stands before an altar holding an athame. Hanging on the wall behind
him is a certificate which reads, "Certified Wiccan initiate. Certificate
granted by Walte's Wild Warehouse of Wicca."
Meaning: Don't get distracted by initiations, titles, special abilities,
etc. Focus instead on what capabilities you really need to live your
You have an insatiable desire to get initiated. Consider joining
either the Fraternal Order of the Hedgehogs or else the Order of
the Co-Hedgehogs and get this whole initiation business out of your system.
A young couple
are having a handfasting performed in a grove of oak trees on a sunny
Meaning: Don't get too cynical. You may be recovering from fanaticism,
but keep in mind that good things can sometimes still happen in the religion.
All you really need is love. And if you don't want to follow that
advice, well, then, hey, the song by the same name is still cool.
A teenage Goth
witch runs down the sidewalk attempting to ride a battered broomstick.
A cleaning lady with a dustpan in one hand chases after her, hoping to
retrieve her stolen broom.
Meaning: You need to develop a better relationship with what
occultists begrudgingly refer to as "the Mundane World."
Maybe you really are a boring person after all. Time to clean up
There's a long
buffet table at a wedding banquet. Whole roast pig, roast duck, baked
chicken, glazed turkey, and caved ham fill the buffet table. One
teeny tiny carrot resides on the plate of the hungry vegetarian.
She eyes the roast pig,
if it might be made out of tofu rather than meat.
Meaning: Time to change your habits.
Go eat a hot dog on a Friday.
The Hermit wears
a dark gray robe and has a dark gray beard. He holds a gnarled staff
in one hand and a blazing lantern in the other hand. He is doing
this however in a crowded movie theater, and the theater patrons scowl
Meaning: Don't just trust yourself. Learn what part of
yourself to trust.
It is better to have something you believe in rather than to just knock
down what you don't believe in.
Wheel Of Fortune
A pagan dressed
in purple and yellow robes holds a stick of incense in one hand and
a compass in the other hand. He glares at the compass. The
needle point is spinning wildly, so that he can't tell which direction
is east for quarter-calling.
Meaning: Don't just find a new direction - create a new direction.
When you think your life is moving somewhere, maybe you're just going
man stands facing a full-length mirror.
Meaning: You may say that there is nothing of value in divinatory tools.
But divinatory tools are nothing more than a means of looking at yourself.
So perhaps you are saying that there is nothing of value in yourself.
A man who swallows a placebo cannot deny his own mouth.
You will see through the illusions created by others. Be on guard
against becoming snotty. Be careful that you do not forget that even
illusions have their value. A man who imagines roses in the
clouds can be inspired to become a gardener.
You see a contortionist,
his body twisted in what appears to be an impossible position. In
fact, his head appear to be stuck up his own rectum.
Meaning: You need to get your head out of your arse.
Even though you think that this doesn't apply to you, you really need to
get your head out of your arse.
apartment is in flames. His shelves are jammed with ceremonial daggers,
magical talismans, occult journals/books, and esoteric tools. Out
of all of this wealth of stuff, what will he try to rescue from the flames?
he is reaching
for his cat.
Meaning: You are about to encounter a situation in your life
where you will make decisions that will show you the limits of occultism.
Occultism is meant to servelife, not the other way around.
Be nice to your cat.
In a candle lit
room, a Hermeticist holds a rosy cross in his left hand and a pentacle
in the right hand. To his left side is a host of symbols of crosses
and grails. To his right side is a host of daggers and pentacles.
Behind him, a window with the shades drawn is open a crack to reveal a
hint of sunlight and the wide open outdoors.
Meaning: You need to open yourself up to more than what you currently
allow yourself to experience.
You are a freak. Perhaps you should spend more time secluded from
others so that others do not discover this.
The scene is
two booths set up at a psychic fair - each booth manned by a practitioner.
The first booth has a big sign over it, "Pagan Shamanistic Journeying Counseling."
The practitioner of this booth glares at the practitioner of the second
booth. The sign over the second booth reads, "New Age Shamanistic
Meaning: There are things that you dislike that are more similar to
you than you care to admit.
Stock market analysts and weather forecasters often give pretty lousy predictions.
Don't expect a fortune-teller to give perfect predictions, but don't look
too harshly upon them either. They are trying to
get you to understand yourself -- and while they may be dead-wrong
on some of what they say, the need to understand yourself is real.
Tower of Books
An armchair magician
has a den jammed full of occult books. In one armchair is a huge stack
of books almost up to the ceiling. He stands on a stool trying to
add yet another book to the top of the stack, ignorant of the
fact that the tower is
about ready to
topple over on him.
Meaning: You need to learn to put your ideas into action.
Clean your room.
In an occult
bookstore, a pagan celebrity sits at a book signing table, signing copies
of her book, Witchcrap for Morons." A few feet away from the
table, a group of neo-pagans are scowling and turning their nose
up at the author.
Meaning: It is far easier for you to condemn what others
create than it is for you to create something that you find to be of value.
But you really need to learn to trust your own creative projects
Quit spending so much time in occult bookstores.
A pagan painter
stands by a moonlit window as he paints a picture of the crescent moon.
The depiction of the moon is very well-crafted, but then the painter is
going back in and adding some crudely designed pentacles on the moon, lest
you forget that this is supposed to be pagan art. Behind him, his
two dogs bark fiercely.
Meaning: If you can let go of your pretentiousness, your talents
Don't forget to feed your dogs.
Three pagan women
stand wrestling over who gets the Golden Apple. Behind them, unnoticed,
stands a giggling Eris, who holds an entire basket of Golden Apples.
Meaning: Keep your perspective on what's really important.
In order to allow a god or goddess room into your heart, you must not be
too full of yourself.
by Conspiracy Theorists
minister rallies against a pagan group. The minister conjures up
images of animal sacrifice and human sacrifice. Meanwhile, the pagan
group in question is sitting around in a committee meeting eating vegan
chili and tofu.
Meaning: You need to get on with your life and worry less about what
other people think.
You need to get on with your life and worry less about what other people
think. On the other hand, this doesn't give you license to be an
World in a Pack of Cards
A grungy prisoner
in solitary confinement sits in a barren cell. No bed, no food, no
sunlight, just a pack of Tarot cards in front of him. A 19th century occultist
once said that a prisoner alone in a prison cell with nothing but a pack
of Tarot cards
all world knowledge. But, well, this prisoner could probably better
use some food and some sunlight and a shower.
Meaning: Get a hobby.
No, really, get a hobby.